15. Three pet peeves.
Paul: Only three? Okay. One, I’m peeved that they expect me to only name three. Two, I’m peeved that I’m wasting my pet peeves on peeving about peeving. And three, I’m upset that peeves aren’t like wishes, where on your third wish, you can wish for more wishes. I want to peeve for more peeves.
Paul: Too much?
Andrew: A tad.
Paul: Fine, then. You tell me your pet peeves.
Andrew: One, I have a pet peeve about bossy men. I don’t like them telling me what to do outside the bedroom. Actually, scratch that. I like to be in charge in the bedroom as well. And you can stop coughing over there, Paul. I know exactly how you respond to being bossed about in the bedroom, and I would say we both like the outcome.
Two, I have a pet peeve about people judging without knowing, especially when it comes to fathers raising their kids. Being a father is the most important thing in my life. Yes, I make mistakes, but doesn’t every parent? I’m doing the best I can and with all the love I have. Butt out!
And third, I have a pet peeve… actually. I don’t have any other pet peeves. I’m pretty chill. And you can stop choking again, Paul. Isn’t that the cool lingo to use? “Pretty chill”?
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